The Memory Flower
by ChildishMickey
Summary: Memories are important to us. Whether they're bad or good, they are a part of us. What if you had a small memory keeper that made the bad ones seem better. This tiny thing helped me understand. Maybe someday we'll meet eachother again under better circumstances. Oneshot! T for suggestive themes, and one bad word! Haha x)


Author's Notes: Hey everybody. Welppppp, i was bored in history class and then the random little projector in my head started playing a mini movie that my imagination was creating. And then when it was over, i was all like coolcoolcool, like Abed from Community, and so i wrote it down, and this is it. It was pretty sad. Hopefully, that little projector plays another made up movie soon.

* * *

His departure was sudden. Who would have expected it? One minute he was wrapped around me, his lovely scent so recognizable, and his perfect face right next to mine. Then the next minute I was left alone and emotionless, just like before I had met him.

I always wondered why it is that the best people die first. In fiction, it's all happy and dandy. The protagonist does something super amazing and heroic and then saves the world, gets the girl and they live in peace forever. Why couldn't it be like that? I mean, he had the super cool weapon, the heroic qualities, and the kind heart. What was missing? What kept him from being like the love stories? Everything, that's what kept him, He was a nobody, so how was he going to be somebody such as a hero, or a savior? It wasn't meant to be. All of here, were never meant to be. The only thing we have in common with those who are somebodies, is that we're all going to die. Apparently, he had to go first and we're all next. Who'll be the last one? I don't know. I just hope it's not me because I want to be the next.

No, I'm not suicidal. I won't kill myself. I don't even know if that's possible because I technically, there's nothing to kill, and even if there was, I'm not that stupid. All in time, just be patient right? ...Even though patience is making me go mad little, by little. I need his presence. I need his sweet smile, and laughter, his beautiful personality and playful ways. I need Roxas.

A few members that like me here at Castle Oblivion would pass by and check up on me to try and cheer me up, but I would just ignore them. So they stopped visiting so often. Many of them say my face is always expressionless, though some actually prefer this side of me. Larxene was thrilled that she no longer had to put up with "loud, obnoxious, lovey-dovey teenagers" and Master Xemnas also seemed to like me more this way because he said that maybe now I would concentrate more on what I was told to do. But then that's another thing, I seemed to be worse. I didn't do anything at all. "Namine, do this, do that. –Maybe later. Namine, I need your help with something. - I can't, maybe later. Hey Namine, You need to eat something, we still require you to be alive. - No thanks, maybe later.", and I never got to any of it. All I wanted to do was stay cooped up in my room, which probably wasn't the best option either because it was filled with drawings that we created together and that I could never find the will to get rid of.

A while after he died, everyone began to slack off. There was no one to collect hearts anymore, so all hope to complete Kingdom Hearts began to fade. Everyone began to get used to the fact that they were going to be nobodies forever. And we just stay here, doing our best to pretend like we are somebodies because that was all that is left; it is all we can do.

Xemnas became sort of like a ghost figure as we rarely hear of him. He stopped sending the members on so many missions, and stopped giving me so many orders, and reasons to use my powers. I wasn't complaining though, because I don't like how he made me use them for selfish reasons anyway. Like me, he stays in his room all the time.

Everything got boring. There isn't much to do in a big quiet hallow castle. I admit, I do talk every now and then when I'm not thinking about it, and I'm not moping around. I talk to Demyx sometimes, Zexion when I'm really bored and want to read a good book, and then Luxord when I have to deny him yet another game. The master too, on those rare occasions that he asks a favor of me. Then there's Axel, the pyromaniac that keeps me company most of the time. The only member I actually talk to a bit more often. I cherish that guy dearly. He became my companion because we went through a same loss.

He was very close with two members of the Organization 13. They were Xion and Roxas. When Xion died he took it pretty harsh, especially when Roxas came through the portal crying his heart out and telling him the story of how she died in his arms. Roxas was in a state of depression for the longest, and that made Axel feel even more miserable. I think the only reason he didn't cry was because he was trying to be strong for Roxas. Eventually, they both recuperated and began to smile again. They began to be able to go out on their daily sea-salt ice cream trips.

One day when Axel was out on a mission and everyone else seemed to be busy, Roxas had nothing to do, so he wandered the halls of the castle until he came upon my doors. He opened them and looked around my room curiously. I gasped in astonishment. From what I knew, Xemnas acutely ordered that no one was to talk or make contact with me without permission. Clearly this boy had no idea what he was doing. He turned to me and looked a little surprised. "So you're the forbidden Namine, huh?" he smiled. A gesture I barely recognized back then.

From that day on he visited me everyday secretly. I began to learn new things from him, and he told me unbelievable stories about different worlds and people he had met. My favorite stories had to be the ones about a so-called Captain Jack Sparrow. He seemed like a silly man, and I would have loved to meet him. Over time we grew close and I started to feel odd. He said he felt the same way. After that day, our relationship changed into just that, something odd.

Soon, someone blew our secret and told Xemnas. I never knew who but I suspected it was Larxene, or Marluxia, someone that didn't like us. The leader was pissed to say the least. He called Roxas to see him immediately. Later, Roxas came back with a smile, bigger than any other I've seen.

"He said you can go out of your room if, and only if, you ask for permission first." I was taken aback by this news. I thought, either Xemnas has gone a little crazy and had some sort of weird change of heart and all of a sudden became less of a bad person, or Roxas was a very convincing person.

I started to become familiar with the entire castle, which turned out to be just as bleak as the only two corridors I knew before. But I guess seeing how the members interacted with each other was pretty cool too. I loved watching the guys complain and whine when they were drunk while playing a game with the undefeated Luxord.

Some time passed before I proved to Xemnas that I was responsible and harmless and was allowed to go out of my room when I pleased as long as I stayed within the castle walls. Unfortunately, a day came when I wanted more that. I wanted to go out and experience all of the adventures Roxas had told me so much about. It's only normal, that I was unpleased with what I was finally given after years. When you reach one goal, you strive for another because you want to keep breaking those walls that constrain you in a limited space. Wanting to experience something new is only natural. This is what I told myself everyday so that I wouldn't feel ungrateful. When I told Roxas of my new dreams, we were in my room drawing. That was a day I remember so vividly. He put on that heart-warming smile and ran off somewhere. He came back again a few hours later out of breath. After composing himself he said, "Xemnas said you can go with me on a mission next month!" Maybe Xemnas really did go completely mad.

I was so happy I tackled him to the ground and did something strange. I wasn't sure what it was at the moment but it felt good. I pressed my lips against his for a second and pulled back. I got up off of him and we both just sat there confused. My face felt hot and I was slightly trembling. Roxas was wide-eyed and was blushing like crazy. I started to think I did something wrong, but then he crawled back towards me and held my face in his hands. He licked his lips and sighed as I sat there breathing a little bit heavier. I wanted him to continue with what he was going to do but it seemed he was taking forever to close the small gap between us. I bit the corner of my lip to try and keep myself under control and doing something wrong. He proceeded and pressed his lips back to mine, this time it was a little longer.

It felt like nothing before, and I kind of wished his soft lips would have stayed there forever but he pulled away again. "So that's why all of them did this." He whispered. I must have looked very confused because he explained. "Well, I've seen a lot of people do this when I go to different worlds and I've always wondered why they do it. Someone told me it's something that helps show how much you love someone. I never quite understood the concept of it, which is why I never tried it with you before," he laughed nervously. "But I think I get it now. They did it kind of different though."

"Different?" I asked. "Yeah, like this." Before I could react properly, he pulled me back and guided me through an awkward process of lip and tongue movements. It was not anything like the first two. It added a different feeling to the sweetness of the other ones. He placed his hands on my hips and I placed one of my hands on his shoulder and the other on his face. In the middle of it he laughed in a way I've never heard him laugh before, it almost didn't sound like Roxas. I loved it. It sent shivers down my spine and brought out a rebellious kind of feeling. I laughed a little too. He stood and picked me up leading us back to my bed, our lips never losing contact. He sat down and straddled me on his lap and his arms wrapped around my waist tightly while my arms unwillingly went around his neck pulling him closer if possible. I didn't feel like I was in control of myself anymore. It was like I was a whole other person that was spontaneous and mischievous. Being now a bit more familiar with what we were doing, we began to have fun with it.

When we finally let go I realized the strange position we were in. He was lying on my bed with his coat gone. His short sleeved black v-neck fit him perfectly showing that he wasn't as small as he looked under that huge jacket. I was on top of him with both of my hands on his semi muscular chest. We sounded like we just ran a whole lot. I got off of him and sat down. He propped himself up on his elbows and laughed his normal playful laugh. "Your hair is messed the fuck up." He pointed. "Your hair isn't so neat anymore either." I replied.

My door suddenly opened and Axel barged in. "Why did I know I'd find you he-", he stopped mid sentence when he looked up at us. He looked like a deer caught in the headlights. "Whoa, sex hair… did you guys just have sex?" he blurted trying not to laugh. "What? No!" we both yelled out at the same time. We heard from axel and a few others around the castle what that word meant, and it sounded like a rather embarrassing thing to do. Being there in front of someone else with all of your glory exposed is not something that seemed fun to me. "Good, because you're only sixteen, and your sir, are seventeen. You guys are too young for that."

Whatever happened that day, seemed to grow into a habit, and it happened more often. Weeks passed and I began to grow anxious. Everyday grew closer to the day I would be able to get out of this colorless castle and go on a grand adventure with Roxas, my Roxas…

A day before it was time, he told me he had to go finish a quick mission. That he would be back shortly. I waited, daydreaming about how our day would go and what fun we would have. I thought about all the people I would meet, and wondered what sea-salt ice cream would taste like. But he never returned. He never came back after that quick kiss and hug on his "Short" leave. And so I was left to keep dreaming forever.

Axel came to my room a few hours later and informed me of the tragedy. I cried for days, maybe even weeks. It sucked because it made me feel weak. How is it that all of a sudden we could feel things? Or maybe we always could, we just wouldn't know what it felt like to feel, so we said that we couldn't feel. Axel was the only other person to show that he could feel as well, because he was the only other person to cry. Then again, he was the only other person to actually care. Demyx was pretty sad too considering that he did spend some times with Roxas, but he still went on as always.

That was when Axel and I began to spend more time with each other. We both lost the person that was special to us. I lost the only one and he lost the remaining one. I couldn't imagine losing two people with such great significance to me, so I couldn't imagine Axel's pain.

…

I heard a knock on the door and it brought me back from my long train of thought. Axel popped in. "Aw c'mon kiddo, not this face again. You should be getting a little bit better after 10 months! Just look at me, I can smile!" he flashed a grin. "But you're not really happy are you?" I said in a monotone voice that was barely audible. "Well, no. I mean I lost both of my best friends, ya know? But I have to try, because you're still here, and like somebodies say, live life to the fullest, right? Maybe when I die I'll be reborn to be someone super cool and amazing." he smiled stupidly. My lips pulled up in a small smile as well. I liked how optimistic Axel was when he wanted to be.

"Anyway, look what came through a portal today for you. The messenger said it came from some place called Radiant Garden." He said. I realized he had a rather large bouquet of flowers in his hands that I didn't notice before. How could I have missed them? I got up a little eager wondering who could have sent me such a surprise. They were very, very pretty. However, I frowned for a second thinking they came from a member in the castle trying to be rude. They all knew today was the very day that Roxas had stumbled upon my room. I've had a few incidents like this happen before after he passed away. All of them resulted in a near death experience on my part. Usually it was because I always tried to rip someone's throat out. I got into a lot of trouble so Xemnas took away what Roxas gave to me, my freedom. I was confined back in my room just like before.

I read the paper attached to the flowers anyway, and I almost passed out. It read,

To Namine, From Roxas –I love you forever my special somebody. Thanks for completing me.

My face paled and my vision blurred. It was his writing! I knew it very well! I dropped the flowers and every possible thought about how he could have survived the incident flooded my head. I began to laugh strangely as I ran to the door. I'm not sure where I was headed to but Axel stopped me.

"Namine! Uh, I'm sorry for being really stupid and forgetting to tell you, but I should have told you, those flowers were bought for you before he… died… He's not alive, he's still gone… it's so like him to get ahead of himself and do things in advance." He put his head down in shame. "It's… okay…" my voice struggled to say. He walked out of the room as a tear streamed down his cheek. I walked back towards the flowers and kneeled down next to them. Some of the petals were scattered on the floor due to the impact of suddenly dropping them. I picked them up and put them on my lap. The tears fell down my face and dripped down onto the beautiful piece of nature he bought me. I hugged them tightly, probably severing a few of them.

I sat on the floor crying hysterically, thinking, did he know? Did he know he was going to die that day? Is that why he bought these in advance? He told me it wasn't such a serious mission. Just collect a few hearts, like always. Why did he lie? If he did know, why didn't he just tell me he wouldn't be able to take me to see the world instead of just leaving me with excitement and hope? He has to have known, this can't have been some amazing coincidence!

After crying for a few minutes, I calmed down and whispered to myself. "No, like Axel said, it's so like him to get ahead of himself. He's just a thoughtful kind-hearted person." I finally looked at the flowers again and noticed that they consisted of small colorful ones. Upon closer inspection, I noticed two tiny figures with blonde hair holding hands in formed by the colors of the flowers. It was amazing how artistic people could be. The boy had a random, beautiful red cherry blossom on the left side of his chest. I picked it out and was surprised to feel that it was a fake. I touched the rest of them to see if they were all that way, but they weren't. The rest were real. I turned my attention back to the cherry blossom and then realized that there was a little paper attached to it.

I've heard a lot about these things from Axel, I think I have one now

"You idiot, this is a flower." I giggled. I knew what he meant though. I know what the flower represents. This little note made a difference in me. I held that fake little flower in my hand like it was the greatest treasure known to ever exist. A treasure like this needs a treasure box.

That's exactly what I did. I got a little glass box and painted a few pretty designs on the edges, and then I placed the flower in there and put it up on my shelf for display. The idea came from one of the stories that Roxas told me about a monster that protected his precious rose in a glass container. It was one of my favorites apart from the pirates. How I missed hearing his voice tell me stories. But at least now I feel some sort of peace.

I went to go get Axel so that he could see my new favorite thing. He smiled too, I was glad to see he gained as much happiness from it as I did.

"Do you know what Roxas was trying to tell you with this?" he asked as we stood in front of the glass box. "Um, well, it has a note, see?" I pointed. "I'm guessing it's that thing you said was a heart, right?" I looked up at his eyes. "Well, yes. But I meant, he's trying to tell you that his heart will always be with you… and do you know what that means?" I shook my head. "No, what?" I asked now smiling big. "It means you turned him into a complete sap and he lost his manliness!" he laughed. "Axel!" I punched him.

We stood there remembering and talking about every happy memory we had with our friend. He told me all the ridiculous things they would do when it was still three of them and he had me laughing for some time. He also promised to talk to Xemnas, so that he could help Roxas keep his promise and take me to see the worlds.

Maybe someday in an alternate universe when we're reborn, we'll find each other again.

(And now you see Sora and Kairi meeting in a similar way that Roxas and Namine met.)

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Author's Note: Yes, yes. Quite a happy ending, eh? No? I didn't think so either. I would be eternally balling my eyes out if this ever happened to my beloved Roxas. ETERNALLY. I love Kingdom Hearts. So much that I have been stalling in KH3D, trying to "level up" before i go to Castle Oblivion. I'm on level 90 for Riku and Sora. I just don't want to finish the game because I don't like to cry. I'm going to stop rambling now. Hope you liked this oneshot! kaykay? Coolcoolcool, end of story. Bye.


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